Saturday, May 18, 2013

Untold Stories of the ER. Told.

I started this the day I got home from the hospital while it was still fresh in my memory but I kept falling asleep while typing. The stupid iPhone app doesn't save drafts like the web does. So here I go again...

So after a crappy week last week and a weekend working this past weekend, I woke up Monday morning feeling pretty rough. My stomach was really upset and I couldn't quite figure out if it was the Monday morning blues or a bug of some type. There has been sickness floating around the office in the guise of allergies and common colds. Every now and then, I hear someone's kid was up sick all night. So it's possible I had been hit with a bug. I went into the office and was pretty weak and hungry when I got there. I decided to go bland and get some grits and a dry piece of toast. Toast was not the best choice but it used to be my go-to to settle my stomach so it couldn't hurt. 

As the morning went in, I felt weaker and my stomach was cramping pretty badly. It started moving from my lower abdomen into my right upper quadrant. I ignored it until someone suggested I lay down. I was starting to feel feverish and couldn't focus. Things were getting pretty fuzzy. So my coworker got the "sick room" key and I laid down in the "bed" for a few minutes. Now don't even think that this is a bed. This is a hard table with a bit of an incline at the top so they don't have to use pillows. There was no sheet or mattress. Just a hard cushion.  I quickly realized this was not helping and laying flat made the pain worse. 

I got up and went back to my desk. We had some folks visiting that day and I was chatting with one of them when I couldn't catch my breath. Pain was shooting across my abdomen and I had not felt this pain before. I had to sit down before I collapsed. I have a pretty high tolerance for pain so this was around a 10-12 on the pain scale.  The rest is a bit of a blur and I remember someone asking if I wanted them to call the ambulance.  I quickly refused and my sweet friend Bonnie came over and offered to take me to the ER.  I normally would have driven myself or gone to my own doctor, but something felt terribly wrong.  

I recently had a visit with the surgeon that did my gastric bypass surgery and there was talk of some possible complications. I got a second opinion and decided not to pursue the tests and possibility of another surgery.  All of this flashed back in my head and I worried that I may have to discuss this again. 

So on the way to the ER I called my sister I let her know what was going on. And my friend Melanie. I didn't want to alarm my other friends and family so I kept it quiet. 

I arrived at the Wake Med ER and Bonnie dropped me off at the door. I gingerly walked in and walked through a metal detector. The security guard asked if I was visiting or checking in. I told him I was checking in (I could barely stand up straight) and he directed me to the front desk.  I waited for about 15 minutes in a line that was about 7 deep, most of which were also checking in. 

While I was in line, I observed my surroundings. I am a people watcher and this is a people watchers favorite place... When you aren't in the midst of the emergency.  There were quite a few people in the ER, which was split in two large sections by the door and the front desk. Behind the front desk was Triage. There were 4 rooms that were numbered accordingly. There was a door to the right of the triage area and then further down were the financial desks. Then there was another door. The nurses walked in and out of this door. 

There were people that were laid out in chairs, covered in blankets, some were completely covered, head to toe, with blankets. Part of me wondered if they still had pulses. There were families and people that were there alone. Some people were in pain, others were just waiting patiently. There were older people in wheelchairs. One was a "SOB" patient (shortness of breath). He was breathing into a mask as his worried wife waited next to him. 

As the morning went on, the pain started to subside, but I noticed I was really sore on/around my rib cage area. So I decided to make the most of this visit. I finally got called to Triage 2. I walked over and the nurse looked at me funny. She said "are you the patient?"  I said yes and then she weighed me (which, by the way, I love those scales!!). She took my vitals and then asked a bunch if questions I would be asked about 8 more times that day. 

There was a door in Triage 2 but I quickly realized that I wasn't going to make it through this door. I wasn't passed out on the floor, seizing or bleeding profusely. I'm not entirely sure those symptoms would've gotten me through that iron clad door. 

So after I finished with her, I peed in a cup and went back to the waiting room. After a couple if hours, yep a couple, I was called back to the next section of the ER. This is what I like to refer to as "purgatory". It wasn't the ER, it wasn't the waiting room. It was a place in between where you were forgotten. You aren't sick enough for the ER but we are are going to follow procedure. There should be a sign on the door that says "you can check out any time you like but you can never leave". 

I also had this misconception that when you go to the ER you automatically get a bed to lay on, regardless of comfort or level of sickness. They wouldn't just sit you in another waiting room...or would they???

So I am seated in a chair in the hallway. My friend Bonnie went back with me. I noticed my cell battery is quickly dying and I have no updates for anyone.  Finally Bonnie decides to go back to work. She had waited as long as she could and it was crystal clear I would be there for a while. 

I thought seriously about leaving and kept saying to myself, I've day here all this time, I'm going to be seen.

I finally got called in to talk with a doctor. Ok, a PA. but I didn't care. I was being seen. She asks me "are you the patient?"  *sigh* Apparently I was dressed too nice to be sitting in the ER as a patient. 

I told her what was going on and she typed notes into notepad on her computer. She misspelled quite a bit. I get annoyed at little things. This would've been a great time to ask for a Xanax. Hindsight is 20/20. 

She repeated everything I said and typed up everything verbatim. She decided she wanted to talk to the doctor but felt I probably had biliary colic. This is a fancy term for an upset stomach. I was not about to sit in that ER for another second if that's all this was. So after another hour, I told the nurse that I wanted to leave and she said I would have to talk with the doctor. I waited a few minutes and the PA finally came and told me I needed an ultrasound and some blood work. 

Threaten to leave and they order more tests. 

And I waited. There was bother waiting room in pergatory where you get stuck. You don't get a bed. They keep those open for really sick folks, apparently. Like ones with scraped knees and girls on their period. Seriously. And they send the contagious folks in the waiting room where I was sitting. 

This "waiting room" was at one time a two-bed room. There was a divider at one time and two sinks and two cabinets. They brought all of the leftover furniture in this room and called it a waiting room. 

People were put in this room (Room 46) and were forgotten. I got to the point where I was crawling out of my skin and had to get up and get out of there. I stood in the hallway and was stepped on and bumped into repeatedly. Do after a couple of hours I asked if I could leave again. They had to wait for the PA to be done with her patient. I finally saw her and told her I would rather follow up with my gastroenterologist than sit and wait. She said she had to talk to the attending doctor before she could let me go, so I had to wait again. Finally, a man rolls up with a wheelchair yelling "Wright for ultrasound!"  

Praise God I didn't have to sit in that waiting room any longer!!

So he wheels me off to ultrasound. On the way, we pass through the REAL ER. What the what???

This place is packed!!  He told me there were 170 beds that were full. They had multiple traumas that day and there were beds in the hallway that were full. It was crazy!!  I was rolled Into the hallway and there they were...beds lined up along the walls in the hall. The only privacy they had were screens stretched at the end of each bed. I was thankful I wasn't laying on one of them. 

I went to ultrasound and the tech did a great job. It was a little too fast because I was comfortable in there. But I had to go back to purgatory. 

So I go back and wait. There was a young girl that I noticed had an iPhone so I asked if she had a charger with her. Mine was beyond dead and she let me borrow her charger. She was really sweet. In for a migraine. I was getting a migraine just from sitting and all the waiting. And the fact I hadn't eaten since 9:30 am. And it was now 7pm.  And they wouldn't even give me crackers in case I needed surgery. 

Sometime between the ultrasound and the surgeons coming in to talk, Bonnie came back. She sat with me in Room 46 along with the other folks that were put in there to be forgotten. There were some interesting folks that came and went. The lady that was covered head to toe in the first waiting room had to be woken several times to be discharged - pretty sure she was coming off a pretty good buzz. There was a young guy advertising his detail skills on cars that had bronchitis and an upper respiratory infection...he also snores. There was a man that had arthritis in his leg. There was a really tall guy that couldn't see out of his eye.  There was a young girl that was having some sort of stomach ailment...really sweet girl. There was a woman that told us her sister went in for gallbladder surgery and died of a brain bleed. There was another woman who talked our ears off about her unemployment situation and how she became unemployed. And another who was beaten by her boyfriend so badly she could hardly walk and cussed her daughter out on the phone for not letting her stay with her that night. 

Finally the PA calls me back and says they want to talk to the surgeon on call.  Said my gallbladder was quite dilated.

And I wait. 3 hours later, the surgeon comes to talk with me. Says my gallbladder looks quite sludgy and they decided it needed to come out. Bonnie left around 8:30 or 9. I was admitted around 10:30 or 11. After 12 hours ok the ER, I was glad to have some answers but really just wanted to go home and crawl in the bed. 

I had surgery around 7:45 the next morning. They had to cut me open a little more than the laparoscopic site because my gallbladder was "the biggest they'd seen" at 10cm. They gave us pictures. Yuck. 

There were also residue from stones. She said it was like the chips in a chocolate chip milkshake. Lots and lots of little chips from gallstones. 

I'm glad it's done. And I will not be going back to that ER willingly anytime, ever. 


Sunday, April 28, 2013

Four Months

Well, I am horrible at blogging... we've established that.

I felt things were getting a tad boring, so I just haven't updated in a while.  :)

However, I have folks asking me why I haven't updated my blog, so here goes... I think?

One of the most frequently asked questions (besides "how much have you lost?") is "Are you glad you did it?"  It's a great question.  It's a little more difficult to answer.  95% of the time, I'm glad I did it.  The other 5%?  Well, that's the hard part.  The other 5% is when I'm dehydrated, frustrated, nauseous, questioning myself, battling with myself each and every day.  Some days, I don't think about it and just go with the flow.  But other days, it's a constant mental battle.  Each day I am faced with choices and I can choose to be happy and healthy or I can choose to be miserable.  I know there are certain things that I used to enjoy eating that I still enjoy eating, but I certainly don't enjoy the way it makes me feel after.  Before surgery, there were no immediate consequences.  Now, there are. 

I have been eating more "normal" foods now.  I start out with protein most days and then eat fruits and veggies if I'm still not full.  Some days are better than others and I don't get as many fruits/veggies as I should.  Portion sizes are tiny compared to what they used to be. 

I have been exercising more.  I started a training group called "Fit-tastic" back in March.  I went every Monday and Wednesday and did run/walk training with a group of folks to train for a 5k.  And then... work happened.

We are in the process of upgrading our Business Online Banking system at work and I have been working until 6 or 7 every night.  I then come home and work more from home.  It has been sucking up all of my personal time.  Don't misunderstand, I still do things with friends and still exercise, just not as often as I did.  Now I come home from work, walk/run Paris and try to figure out what's for dinner and whether I feel like eating anything.

I have developed a very strange aversion to certain foods.  If I cook it, I can't eat it... especially proteins.  More specifically, chicken.  Chicken is not my friend these days.  I get nauseous when I smell it cooking, I get nauseous when I have to eat it and I get nauseous when it's reheated.  Sometimes I can cook it and eat it a day later, but not always.  I feel the same way about hamburger sometimes too... I have to cook spaghetti or chili one day and eat it the next.

I'm good as long as I don't have to prepare it... if I eat out or eat at the cafeteria at work, it doesn't bother me.

I recently went for my 3 month follow up with my surgeon's office (the PA) and talked to her about nausea.  I mentioned that I was nauseous more than 4 times a week and she was concerned.  She had the nurse perform a swallow test on me to determine if I had any leaks or anything going on with my pouch.  They said it appeared I have what's called "out-patching" where part of the pouch extends beyond the normal shape.  It's also called the "candy cane effect".  They wanted me to have an endoscopy done and then I would likely have surgery again.

Let me just tell you.... when I heard those words, I was full of all sorts of emotions.  I was angry, frustrated, sad, annoyed, and most of all, confused.  She said it was common, but I just didn't want to believe that.  So I got a second opinion.  I went to another surgeon in another bariatrics practice and told him what they found.  He was not at all concerned and said that nausea is very common post surgery for 6-9 months and sometimes up to a year.  He also said that several of his patients are nauseous with every meal and have feeding tubes to help them get the nutrients they are missing out on.

I sat back, relieved and thankful... I can't imagine going through everything I went through and having to have a feeding tube.  No thank you.  I shall not complain about nausea.  It is fine.

Other than that, I have had a lot of problems with my sciatic nerve and my back.  Some days are worse than others.  I have to sit on the heating pad a lot to get any relief.  I hope it's just my body adjusting to the redistribution of weight... but I will probably have to get that checked out soon.  I can't sleep, can't sit, can't stand... it hurts most days and makes exercising more difficult.

So recently, someone posted some OLD pictures of me on Facebook (you know who you are... :)).  These pictures were quite the eye-opener for me.  I thought that I knew my highest weight (I thought it was from this past October) but I believe I am mistaken.  There was a period of time six or seven years ago when I was in complete denial over my weight and I'm pretty sure I was in the 350 lb. range.  Shocking, I know.  When I look at these pictures and compare them to the pictures I have from last fall, they are just disturbing.  So knowing that and knowing where I am today... I am quite pleased with what has transpired.

I know you're all dying to know the numbers, so here they are.
Since October, 2012, I have lost 72 lbs.  I have gone from a size 26 to 18/20 (some pants are 20/22).  My shoe size has gone down a whole size.  My face is much smaller.  My rings, watches and bracelets fall off now.  My coats/jackets don't fit anymore.  I have noticed little things, like how pronounced my collarbone is now and my knees are much more defined.  My arms need some work - there's some excess fat/skin I need to tighten up and tone.

I recently went to a Canes game at PNC Arena (still sounds strange calling it that) and I was so pleased with how I fit in the seats... I went to a concert there in December and had to wedge myself into the seat and wiggle myself out.  I practically stood up the entire concert because I was so uncomfortable.  I was so much more relaxed and had such a great time at the Canes game... jumping up and down from the seat without having to hoist myself up.  It was great!  I have been walking a lot and go on much longer walks now without getting winded.  I can walk 2 miles easily and keep going if I want.  I can climb the stairs at work faster and easier - there are stairs that lead to the cafeteria and I used to have to take the elevator in order to breathe properly once I got to the top.  Now, I get to the top and I don't even notice a difference in my breathing.  I can talk and carry on a conversation the whole way up.

I find myself going out more and enjoying the spring weather these days.  I used to take Paris out and let her do her business and come back inside.  Now, we take longer walks and play quite a bit when we get home.  She needs that exercise and so do I!

I am excited about what the future holds and excited to see how this new body is going to work for me. I am planning to travel more and enjoy my friends and this fabulous city more.  I will be getting a bike soon and hope to start riding some trails and greenways around the area.

Thanks everyone for your support and encouragement.  The compliments are always welcome!  It's fuel for the tank and motivates me to keep going!

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Reasons I Love Losing Weight

This will be an ever evolving list, but here are a few...

1. Not having to pull my bra straps up 400 times a day

2. Crossing my legs for more than 2 minutes without severe cramping

3. Not getting winded walking... Up stairs, walking the dog, cleaning the house, from the back of the parking lot

4. Getting out of bed without pain

5. Getting dressed in the mornings

6. Getting out of the car or up from a chair without having to heave-ho or hold onto anything

7. Playing with my niece & nephew without getting tired quickly

8. Not having a need for the ever growing pile of change I used to spend in the vending machines at work.

9. Going to a concert or hockey game without worrying about whether I will fit in the seats

10.  Traveling without having to worry about asking for a seat belt extender

11.  Catching myself in the mirror and being pleasantly surprised at what I see

12.  Seeing people that I haven't seen in a while and watching them struggle with recognition and try to figure out what's different

13.  Sharing my successes with friends and having them share their successes with me

14.  Meeting small goals and celebrating those victories

15.  Parking at the back of the parking lot at work and enjoying the walk to and from the building

Sunday, February 24, 2013

On the Move!

Constant movement.  I've been moving and moving and moving and I'm expecting to crash and burn at any moment... except that as part of this new lifestyle, I have tons more energy... so I think I'm good!  I have been getting up earlier and working out.... going to work early, working late... spending time with family and trying to keep myself honest with the food I'm eating.

It's definitely harder right now... PMS = chocolate cravings... Spring time = Easter candy... Easter candy = Cadbury Creme Eggs... my absolute favorite.  Whoever made those are just evil.  I went to Target recently and got some goodies for a close friend who was having a baby... I love to take things to the hospital that dad and visitors can munch on as well as give mommy something sweet to snack on after all is said and done.  I mean, all that work in delivering a baby, somebody betta bring me a candy bar!! <growl!>

So, confession time... I got a box of Cadbury Creme Eggs for my friend.... and I got a box for me.  You thought I was going to say I avoided it, huh?  Nope.  No lies here.  I did it.  I put it in the cart... I wheeled it to the register... and I knowingly paid for that box of evil.  Have I opened it?  Yes.  Have I tried one?  Yes.  But just one.  I didn't feel great after.  I felt more disappointed in myself than sick.  Just disappointed in my weakness.  But you know what?  We are all WEAK.  I don't care what anyone says.  If someone tells you they've been perfect and haven't cheated during something like this, whether dieting or exercising or post weight loss surgery, they... are... lying...!!!  You try to determine your limits.  You try to find things that you can snack on here and there to fulfill that taste craving you have.  It's not rocket science, folks.  It is what it is.  We are human and we are weak.

But let me just say, I am not taking advantage of this situation.  I knew when I selected this surgery that I was a cheater when it came to food.  That's precisely why I had this surgery.  I get sick when I eat (light) sour cream, but I don't when I eat an entire Cadbury Creme Egg?  Seriously?  What's wrong with this picture?  As soon as sour cream hits my stomach, no matter how large or small the amount, I have this internal burning sensation like someone has dropped 80 habanero peppers down my throat.  It's quite painful.  But I can eat a Cadbury Creme Egg and go to sleep?  Heh... little devilish eggs.  Pure evil those eggs.

Enough about the eggs.  I didn't get to work out a lot last week.  Work continues to prove busier than ever.  I guess that's a good thing because I come home, walk the dog for a mile or two, eat dinner (lately, Parm Encrusted Tilapia and veggie of choice), and head to bed.  I haven't been overeating or lazing around... just move from one task to the next to the next.  It keeps me honest.  Lunches consist of a wrap or burger without a bun or soup or whatever the healthy entree is at work.  Some days it's just fruit and some type of protein.  Some days it's at my desk and whatever I bring from home.  It is my life at the moment.  It is quite busy.

Good thing about that is, constant movement = constant weight/inches lost.  I've lost about .5 lb short of 50 lbs.  It has been 2 months and 4 days.  I'd say that's pretty darn good.  I have been retiring clothes here and there... and the jeans I wore this weekend will be retired for life... I took them off tonight without unbuttoning them.  I sat down in them at church this morning and my belt buckle was touching the center part of my bra.  My nephew walked around the house pulling his pants up acting like an old man to mock me.  It's time. They're done.  I have several pants like that.  Shirts, don't even get me started.  I had shirts I had bought back in the fall that I can't keep on my shoulders, much less cover up my chest with now.  Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled I'm losing weight.  Just don't have the time to go shopping to find new stuff!!

So, I start swimming this week.  Hopefully going to get these arms and upper body shaped up.  Then mid-March I start training for FitTastic, the Run-Walk club.  That will be two days a week and will end with the Susan G. Komen race in June.  I'm excited about that!  I hear it's a great race - folks in the neighborhood on the route decorate their yards and cheer you on.  It's a big deal in the Triangle!

Well, going to catch up on some shows and then head to bed.  A new week of new and better choices starts tomorrow.  :)

For now,

Monday, February 11, 2013

A New Day at Old Navy

Last week was crazy busy and this weekend I had all intentions of going to the gym for some swim time and yoga and then relaxing for the weekend. Haha. I should know by now to not make plans to never works out as I intended. I came home Friday night after stopping by Trader Joes on the way home. I got some yummies there and came home with plans to cook. My body had other intentions. I sat in the chair to relax a bit and woke up 2 1/2 hours later, not quite sure what day it was. It really annoys me when this happens because I feel so unproductive. I got a bite to eat and then went to bed. So much for Friday night.

Saturday, I woke up around 7. I got up and went downstairs to have breakfast and relax on the couch. There was a swim class at 9:30 and a yoga class at 11. I guess I relaxed so much I woke up at 10 on the couch. Then my sister called and said they were coming to Raleigh for the day. By the time they got here, my stomach was screaming at me for something I had eaten. Jamie wanted to return some stuff to Old Navy. Lily was with us and we decided to stop at Panera for lunch. I had soup and Jamie had soup/salad. Lily had what looked like an amazing pb&j because she wore it all over her face!!

We eventually ended up at Old Navy. I had ordered some workout clothes and needed to return some (too big!!), so I started looking around. I honestly didn't think I would find anything that fit. we walked around for a while and Lily and I picked out some clothes for her to try on with us. We got matching Wonder Woman T-shirts. I felt a little old when she said "who is that???", but after I told her I used to watch the cartoon, she really liked it. She also liked the Smurfs and Batgirl T-shirts. She's a funny kid...favorite shows are The Brady Bunch and Full House... Noah's favorites are Bonanza and Daniel Boone. Love those kids!

Anyway, we all three hauled into the dressing room at the same time. Lily modeled while Jamie and I flew through clothes. I ended up with more than them.... Because I can actually wear the clothes in Old Navy now!! It's been at least 10 years since I've shopped in there. It's exciting!! I would have paid twice the amount I paid at Lane Bryant or somewhere that sold plus sizes. It's nice to be able to fit into things that don't cost extra for being a fluffy chick.

I slept most of Sunday away with a migraine, but I did get a wifi DVD player at an auction in RMT. This then led to a Netflix membership renewal and which then led to a marathon of the first season of Downton Abbey. Can't wait until season 2 is available! Have also been catching up on movies. I worked from home today and planning to head to the gym tomorrow morning to try out the pool for the first time. We'll see how that goes! It's a new week!!


Thursday, February 7, 2013

Crawl, Walk, Run

Howdy, folks!  I have been really busy over the past week.  I am now a card-carrying member of the YMCA in N. Raleigh!  Woot!!

I know I say this every week, but I have been slammed at work.  I literally get out of bed at 5am, go to the gym (ok, so today was the first day, but if I tell myself I've been doing it, then I'll keep doing it), come back home, shower, walk Paris, fix lunchbag, drive to work, don't leave parking lot until 6pm or so (tonight, I forgot where I parked... walked from one end of the parking lot to the other... hey, it's exercise!), come home, walk Paris, cook dinner, and.... CRASH.  Lather, rinse & repeat.  I should be in bed now.  But I have a feeling most of my friends are quietly mumbling things about me not keeping my blog up to date...

So, this week has been interesting.  Not only did I join the gym, but I did a bad, bad thing.  After I went to the gym Tuesday night, I was starving.  I decided to go through Chick-Fil-A drive through.  That was tough.  I ordered a Grilled Chicken Sandwich, no bun, with a side of fruit.  Ha.  You thought this was where I did the bad thing, didn't you?  Nope.  I was strong.  I was good.  I drove home... or towards home.  On the way home, there is a Bojangle's.  I had a migraine.  When I have a migraine, for some strange reason (in my screwed up head), Bojangle's fries make my head feel better.  Could be the carbs or the grease... dunno.  Or at least, that was the case, pre-op.  Now, I have paid dearly for the Bojangle's fries.  I probably only ate 5 or 6.  I scarfed them down.  I gave Paris some.  I was all about some Bojangle's fries.  (The Chick-fil-A sandwich is in the fridge, if you're wondering.)

This is normally where I tell you I was as sick as a dog, all night long.  Nope... Paris was, but not me.  I didn't get sick.  But I noticed when I got in the bed I had this strange sharp pain in this tiny little area below my stomach (pouch).  I ignored it and fell asleep.  Yesterday, it was worse.  It was constant.  And then it moved.  It moved it's way through my bowels.  It was a rough day.

Did I learn my lesson?  Absolutely.  Will I do it again?  I will never say never.  But, I will always remember how it made me feel.  Yuck.  Disgusting.  (Paris is fine, just had a nice intestinal blowout... aka diarrhea)

So I got up at 5:00 am feeling better.  I went to the gym.  That place is packed even in the mornings!  I got there in time so that I didn't have to wait for a machine, but there were people waiting when I got off of the treadmill.  I'm moving slowly... gradually building up my distance and time.  I'm not pushing or rushing.

I ran into the lady that registered me Monday night.  Her name is Jenny and she is so sweet.  She said she was glad to see me and had been telling folks about me and the surgery.  She is really excited to see the results.  I am too. :)

So after Tuesday and today, my shins are KILLING me.  I have some runner friends and I took their advice and went to Capital Run Walk for a gait analysis and to be fit for proper shoes.  I came home with some pretty great shoes (Brooks Adrenaline).  All this time, I've been wearing the wrong size.  I've been buying a size 10 or 11... mainly because of the width.  I came home with a 9 1/2 and they feel great!

It was funny, when I first walked in, they asked if I was there to pick up a packet.  I asked what they were referring to and there is a Krispy Kreme Dash this weekend.  I had not heard of this... apparently people enter this competition to run 2 miles to a Krispy Kreme, then proceed to eat a dozen glazed donuts and run back.  What the?????  NO.... THANK YOU.  I would DIE. (especially now)

Since I've been going to the gym, I am sleeping like a baby.  It feels great.  I am hoping some of the pain of my body adjusting to this new strange thing called exercise will subside soon.  I just have to push through the next few weeks.

Paris is quite confused with the new schedule.  She will get used to it, but I have to get it down to a routine, for her benefit and mine.  I will walk her in the mornings, and then when I get home at night, I will take her on a LONG walk to burn off some energy.

Today, when I was perusing the Capital Run Walk website, I found something called Fit-tastic!  Now, I love a good play on words, but this is genius (not the word, but the concept... stay with me folks).
"Fit-tastic is a 12-week training program geared toward the beginning walker/runner who wants to develop a healthy and sustainable exercise regimen. We have experienced, certified coaches who have put together a program designed to help you achieve your goals with the support of others like yourself."
Guess who signed up?  This chick.  Thankfully it doesn't begin until March 11, so I have a month to get out of the clumsy, awkward walking stage... yes, I'm clumsy.

I signed up for two different 5k's recently.  One is at the end of March - it is an Off-Road Challenge for The Biggest Loser in Charlotte.  The other is in April - Angels Among Us at Duke.  I may not be able to do the off-road challenge (given the aforementioned clumsy awkwardness).  I will decide that later on though.

But for now, I need to go to bed so that I can get up at 5am and get to the gym... in my new shoes. :)

Good night for now!
42 lbs lighter

Friday, February 1, 2013

Follow the Yellow Brick Road

"Just follow that one road the whole time!... I hope THEY don't get lost, I'm so bad at giving directions..." Glinda in Wicked.

Not sure why this has been on my mind so much... I think I relate this journey I am on to Dorothy's journey in the Wizard of Oz. There are twists and turns and some scary things and some things that make you smile. You meet interesting people along the way and you meet people that are mean and unsupportive. But most importantly, you follow this road to meet the goal you've set for yourself... Whether it's to find someone special, to lose half of your body weight or to find your way home is no matter. What matters most is that you follow the road...follow your heart and love yourself. "Just follow that one road the whole time!"

The past two weeks have been pretty busy. As I mentioned in my previous post, things at work have been...stressful. I literally come home and clean or cook or both and crash. My energy levels are much better than they were. I have really gotten into a groove with my eating habits. I did notice one day this week I didn't plan and had quickly grown tired of reheating leftovers, so I went to work with little snacks but nothing substantial to eat. Luckily there was soup in the cafeteria that day that I could eat. It was good and filling. But I realized that I need to have a plan each day. The biggest issue I have faced is not really wanting what I've packed in my lunch bag that day once I get to work. I know things will get better when I can have real foods because then I will be able to eat salads or grilled chicken in the cafeteria on those days I'm having the Lunchbag Blues.

I have made some pretty yummy recipes lately. My favorite was chicken & broccoli in Alfredo sauce (Bertolli's Light Alfredo sauce). Another favorite is the pizza. Mission tortilla shels come in Carb Balance. I added sundried tomato pesto as sauce, then mozzarella, Parmesan, feta, & pepperoni. Deliciousness!!!!

I went today for my B12 shot & the PA was pleased with my energy. I also had lunch at Firebirds with my team from work. I ordered wood grilled salmon with steamed veggies. It was yummy! This weekend I am spending time with my sister for her birthday. We just got back from Walmart where I got lots of fruit & stuff to make pizzas this weekend.

Unfortunately, I have been craving chocolate. We got some of the weight watchers English toffee candies. They hit the spot!

I wrote out some motivating quotes an put them on my mirror in my bathroom. If I feel rough or feel like giving up, I can quickly remind myself to keep going and try harder!!

Sorry it's been so long since I blogged. I really am trying to be better about it!!

For now... 41 lbs lighter,